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The New Band on the Block
CONTENT WARNING: MODERATE LANGUAGE (Against a scrolling red background with the Ugly NI, '70s style JuGo, and NHK logo, Takashi Edwards says "This is Public TV For Isuten, on viewer-supported JOTO-TV and JOIT-TV." PUBLIC TV FOR ISUTEN flips in, written in Kanji, along with the Ugly NI and '70s style JuGo.) Previously on Pretty Cure Heavy Metal... Pistols N Flowers showed signs of cracking, especially after a heated argument that led to one of its key members quitting. The subject matter involved the direction of the band. Paul Rivers, or Backslash (as he was popularly known as), wanted to stick to the tried-and-true blues formula. W. Benny Bara, on the other hand, wanted to go industrial. Things then came to a head when "Tough Rose" Mackane and Mac Storeum heard that Backslash had left. Mac got into an argument with Bara over Backslash and got fired for the effort. Mackane left on his own terms shortly afterwards. When last we saw this threesome, they were talking about forming a new band. A band that would surpass Pistols N Flowers as the favorite heavy metal band of the Tri-Cities. As the discussion went on, a stranger by the name of Shigeru Korematsu came in, suggested the name Velvet Beretta, and joined the new band. Thus started the strange, eventful history of Velvet Beretta. ----------------------------------------------------------------------- (OP: "Hopscotch of Love" by Lovely and Wild Angels) ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Today's episode "The New Band on the Block" ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Sunday morning. Sakura is going down Mokuten Higashi Avenue for no apparent reason while singing "Born to be Wild". Suddenly, she sees Kato Warando trodding along downcast. She asks, "Wassup, Kato?" Kato just says, "Piss off, bitch." "Fine," she says. "I was just going to ask you why you're so downcast." Kato says, "It finally happened." Sakura asks, "What did?" Kato asks, "Well, remember how I sometimes told you my band was in danger of breaking up?" Sakura says, "Yeah, sort of." "It finally happened." Sakura gasps. "Maria, Kami-sama no haha!" Kato says, "Seems as though my bandmates finally tired of my antics and each other. So, they called it quits." Sakura says, "Well, I hope you find a new band soon." Kato, looking determined, says, "You bet your ass I will." ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Meanwhile, at the Roxy Recording Studio, Haruhi Sorano is helping W. Benny Bara record the vocals for the title track of Venezuelan Democracy. After the session ends, Bara says, "I just wish my old bandmates were back." Mr. Sorano asks, "Why?" Bara says, "Well, definitely not Backslash, but maybe Tough Rose Mackane and Mac Storeum, and definitely Izumi Stradlin. Things just aren't the same without them." Mr. Sorano says, "Well, if you feel so bad about them leaving, why don't you do a reunion show after the album's finished?" "Because either Backslash or I will die before the two of us are reconciled, dammit!" Bara shoots back. "And besides, he's in my ass." Mr. Sorano says, "I know how you feel, but I just wanted to say it would be good for Mr. Stradlin to perform with you again." Bara sighs and says, "Yes, I know. I just sometimes feel like the sky is falling." Cue the wipe downward to the next scene. ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Mitsuuru Takahashi, meanwhile, is making a 3-D video using a stereoscopic webcam. Yes, Isuten is the most technologically advanced of the Tri-Cities, especially when it comes to movie-making and all things related. His sister Yuki activates the webcam, and he says, "This is Mitsuuru Takahashi of the Isuten Junior High drama club. By the time you watch this video, Golden Week may be over. "I will tell you that the Third Harvest results will be in tomorrow, and being an Isuten Junior High student myself I hope to Kami-sama that we beat Mizu Junior High. "Especially after the double embarrassment that happened at the end of the last school week before Golden Week, I'm full of school spirit. "I am of course talking about Mizu students vandalizing Isuten Junior High and Mizu subsequently kicking our asses in the football game the following Saturday. "The other thing I wanted to talk to you viewers about is that Futari wa Hearty Pure Over the Rainbow is set to enter production at Shogun Studios in a couple of weeks. "And yes, Miss Lori Nekoshippo is a part of the cast. She'll portray Princess Felicity. The actresses playing the Pures are Michiko Shikinami as Pure Flower and Erika Mishima as Pure Avian. "The Big Bad in this one is going to be played by Katsuhiro Tezuka. The girls that will spy on the Pures, Mikuru and Kaori Kimura, will be played by Emiko Matsushita and Rica Toyoda, respectively. That's all." ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Meanwhile, Kato is wandering around the Quick Machines Hotel when he sees a peculiar door. On it is the text "WANTED - A VOCALIST WHO CAN COMPETE WITH W. BENNY BARA". Kato says, "Now there's an opportunity." He heads for the door. As soon as he knocks, Backslash answers. "Who are you?" he asks. Kato says, "Kato Warando of Isuten Junior High. And you?" Backslash says, "Paul Rivers, formerly of Pistols N Flowers. What's your business here?" Kato says, "I saw a sign on the door, and I couldn't help but notice. I hope you don't mind." "Of course not," Backslash says, "so long as you can compete with W. Benny Bara." "I'd be delighted," Kato says. "Right now he's probably gloating about how my own band, Rock Temple Pirates, fell apart." Backslash asks, "The question is, how well can you sing?" Kato says, "I'll show you." He then breaks out into a full chorus of "Hex Type Thing". Backslash just stands there shocked. "...Ohh-kay. I think I should introduce you to your new bandmates." With that, he escorts Kato into the hotel room. Backslash says, "Two of your bandmates, besides myself, were once a part of Pistols N Flowers, just as I once was. "Mac Storeum's the drummer. He took Esteban Palomita's place after the latter's drug problem got him the axe during production on the Use Your Allusion albums. "Recently Mac got fired for defending me to W. Benny Bara's face. He took Tough Rose Mackane with him, and together, the three of us founded Velvet Beretta. "Tough Rose Mackane's the bassist. He took Benson Olds's place shortly after Pistols N Flowers was formed. He left on his own terms after Mac got fired. "I'm the lead guitarist. I took Ken Pistols's place around the same time Mackane and Palomita joined. I left on my own terms over the direction of the band. "And Shigeru Korematsu's the rhythm guitarist. He joined just as we were starting the band. He's a veteran of Gdansk and Drunken Youth." Backslash asks, "So... what do you think? Do you want to join Velvet Beretta?" Kato says, "Certainly." Backslash says, "Alright, kid. Welcome to Velvet Beretta. We start recording in one week at the Dirty Little Recording Studio. Here's the address. Have a nice day." Kato says, "Thanks." ----------------------------------------------------------------------- (Eyecatch 1: Rizuka and Shugo are jamming when Sakura runs past them and grabs the microphone. The PCHM logo appears in the bottom-left corner.) (Eyecatch 2: The camera goes between Isuzu on her bass and Taiko in her drum kit and stops when Sakura with the microphone is in view. The PCHM logo appears in the bottom-left corner.) ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Shugo is browsing the stock of native Japanese VHS tapes (mixed in with American imports) at Takei no chuuko no hon to eiga to ongaku. She spots a 1978 VCI Command Performance VHS tape of Gatchaman: The Movie and picks it up. She then spots a 1982 Roadshow Home Video 3-D VHS tape of the first live-action Hearty Pure movie (a 3-D film dating back to 1953) and is a bit confused ("How did an Australian tape make it to Japan?") but picks it up anyway (3-D glasses and all). As she picks up a 1984 VHS tape of Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind, she spots Mitsuuru Takahashi coming in. "Hello, Shugo." A bit startled, Shugo says, "Oh, hey, Mitsuuru. I was just shopping for VHS tapes." Mitsuuru asks, "Did I ever tell you that you look like you might be Emma Watson's long-lost sister?" Shugo says, "Thank you." Mitsuuru says, "You're welcome. But it's not why I came. The real reason is because I'm looking for some good American imports." Before going to the cash register with her loot, Shugo says, "Go right ahead." Mitsuuru's searching nabs him the following tapes: *1980 MGM/CBS Home Video VHS tape of The Wizard of Oz *1993 MGM/UA Home Video letterboxed VHS tape of 2001: A Space Odyssey *1985 RCA/Columbia Pictures Home Video VHS tape of Starman *1985 United Home Video VHS tape of Dark Star *1999 Walt Disney Home Video letterboxed VHS tape of A Bug's Life Satisfied with his find, Mitsuuru heads for the cash register. ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Meanwhile, Sakura makes it all the way to MacArthur Avenue, where the Dirty Little Recording Studio is located. She spots Kato there, preparing for rehearsals with Velvet Beretta. Startled, she asks, "What are you doing here? I thought I'd already seen you a few hours ago!" Kato says, "Just preparing for rehearsals with my new band." Sakura asks, "What new band? Weren't you jobless a few hours ago?" Kato says, "I'm now the lead vocalist for Velvet Beretta." Sakura asks, "What is Velvet Beretta, anyway?" Kato says, "Just a new band formed by three former Pistols N Flowers members as part of their revenge scheme against W. Benny Bara." Sakura gasps. "No way! This can't be!" Kato says, "Better believe it, sister. If all goes well, we may become more popular than Jesus, to quote John Lennon." Sakura says, "Number 1, the last time any music artist said their band was more popular than Jesus their records got burned in religious communities such as the Bible Belt, and number 2... "Well, let's just say W. Benny Bara might develop a grudge against you for throwing your lot in with Backslash." Kato says, "I'm willing to face the consequences, if I'm to be part of any band." Sakura says, "Well, I hope your rivalry doesn't go as far as the bitter feud between Cure Coke and Cure Pepsi in Tokyo." Kato says, "Don't worry, I don't have any latent powers within me." Sakura asks, "Wanna keep a secret?" Kato says, "Sure." Sakura says, "Well, I do. In fact, I lead a group of five girls, including myself, that do battle against a group of Satanists called Mansonia. "For the past five episodes, as well as this one, things have been pretty peaceful. I guess even Satanists observe Golden Week, eh?" "Don't say eh at the end of each sentence," Kato says, "or you might be mistaken for a Canadian, eh?" Sakura says, "Hypocrite." She then sticks her tongue out playfully before parting ways with Kato for now. ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Sakura is at the theatre watching the latest installment of the Jim Nameke series, The Interdimensional Experiment, in which Nameke must race against time to prevent a madman from destroying the world with an artificial black hole. As Nameke is fighting the mooks onscreen, he knocks one of them off of the platform and into a bottomless pit. As the mook falls, he emits the Wilhelm scream. Sakura says to herself, "That really did call for a Wilhelm scream." She continues to eat her popcorn, and when she's done she eats her Reese's peanut butter cups. ----------------------------------------------------------------------- After the movie ends, Sakura exits the AMC Tri-Cities 14, where the movie was being shown. She still has the TrioScopics 3-D glasses with her, since they're disposable and she decided to keep them. She says, "Wow, what a movie. I felt like I was part of the action with Jim Nameke." Then she asks herself, "What will W. Benny Bara say when he finds out the boy I've been developing feelings for has joined forces with Backslash?" She says to herself, "I've got to tell him." ----------------------------------------------------------------------- As the sun sets, the Quick Machines Hotel is quiet as Backslash and Mackane are looking out the balcony. Mackane says, "I really miss the good old days." Backslash says, "Hey, at least we still share the rights to the Pistols N Flowers name with W. Benny Bara." Mackane says, "Yeah, but things just aren't the same without the band. I wish you hadn't decided to leave." Backslash says, "Yeah, well, wherever he is, Bara probably hates me now. In fact, I think he hates me more than he hates you and Mac." Mackane says, "I think you're right." Mac shows up and asks, "So how did your side project work out?" Backslash says, "It wasn't as successful as I had hoped, but at least I got it done." Mackane asks, "Isn't the sunset beautiful in the Land of the Rising Sun?" Mac says, "You could say that." ----------------------------------------------------------------------- Sakura walks to the Roxy Recording Studio by herself. When Itsuki Ikari asks her for the password, she says "Swordfish" in a dejected tone. As Ikari lets her in, he asks, "Why the long face?" Sakura says, "None of your business. I'm telling my reason to W. Benny Bara personally." She trudges all the way to the recording room, where Bara is finishing a session. As soon as he notices her, he says, "Come on in." Sakura says, "I have some bad news." Bara asks, "What is it?" Sakura says, "My boyfriend-to-be, Kato Warando, joined forces with Backslash." ----------------------------------------------------------------------- (ED: "Raw and Wild" by Lovely and Wild Angels) ----------------------------------------------------------------------- (Next episode preview) BACKSLASH: I'd like to see a Pistols N Flowers live album. MACKANE: Tell W. Benny Bara for us. SAKURA: Mr. Bara, your former bandmates want to do a live album. BARA: I'd like to do one too, which is why I'm asking you to play the part of the diplomat and transmit suggestions between myself and those two. SAKURA: Aye aye, skipper! Next episode: "It's a Live!" We're coming live and loaded!﻿